Hulk, Discipline and Happiness Economics? Not

St. Patty's Day, You'd think it just wouldn't be as fun as previous ones pre-kid.  Boy did I get that wrong. On St. Patty's Day we painted Dax green with homemade green body paint.  Head to toe.

So why did we do this?  Are we trying to teach Dax to be proud of his 1/8 Irish Heritage? 

Actually, I say 1/8 but who really knows...  I know we have definite Irish family names, features some not very far removed.  However, like most, we have almost equally English and I'm also aware of the very strong Dutch variety in our family. Heil Mutterland Swing Heil! (loved that movie).

Oh and let's not forget about my family's treasured American Indian heritage (just like everybody and their dog in the South who just like me has a great grandfather (GF) or great-great GF who was a Cherokee Chief...)  Actually in my case I seriously doubt he was a chief and I actually think he was a she - the stories get blurred.   ("he was a she" as in a great-great grandmother - not a drag queen).  But, this is just on my side. 

And Clint's family origins?  I'm going to go with Icelandic Vikings.  Yeah, that would be really cool.  Especially if Icelandic Vikings ever existed. Did, do they? I don... I'm pretty sure there were. 

Anyway! Why did we paint Dax green head to toe?  b/c he woke up and wanted to be Hulk for the day.  So, we painted him green and tore up a pair of shorts that already had a hole in it.  No pic.  But not to worry Grandmother, he'll want to be hulk again soon enough and I have just enough homemade green body paint left.

Then we built sandcastles. It must have been the hottest day this Winter.  He was a lovely mess so after all that he went for a swim and played with his pool toys in the bathtub arm swimees and all.  Thank GOODNESS all the body paint came off and didn't (as I seriously worried it would) leave my fair skinned lovely boy a light shade of green. Now that would have been the pic to take. Typical day school day or no.  I'm left exhausted and got nil yard work done. I didn't get anything chorely done matter of fact.  Oh, and look it's now time for dinner.  That's the way of it here lately.

It may sound like this child gets to do whatever he dreams up and maybe he does. I should maybe make a point to take on more of the mom role instead of co-conspirator. It's just such a shame to have to pass up on fun like that sometimes or in our case, outside of church and school, all the time. 

I mean my favorite preach is don't put something off for tomorrow that you can do today.  But I'm terrified of the hedonistic lifestyle that we live today.  In my opinion, it's one of many reasons for our downfall in society.

But what to do when find yourself saying "why not" instead of "not today ALL of the time?" Which is my thought process when Dax comes to me with these "fun" request. I think:  "Well, we got the stuff to do it, I could manage pull [X] off by doing [X], we're not off schedule... Why not?"

When you stop and think about the stuff he gets to do and, though this is horrible, compare the nos to the yeses and realize your rarely say no.  Let's face it grownups, we know that the world is not like that...  We may charge our credit cards up, put stuff off to the bitter end and go out of our way to keep ourselves smiling and happy.  In our minds, it's more like grabbing at the only bit of comfort and the infamous "me-time" we can get.  But that fiddler always wants what's due.  I'll not set him up for physical, tangible, infereal, mental, moral, whatever and etc... debt.  Or at least I can try my best.  But I find myself letting him and helping him do anything he dreams up for the day - like giving in to his "Charlie and Lola" role playing.

Chores.  Maybe that's it.  I think it's time for more chores.  Though he usually destroys the leaves if I can get him to rake them up or ends up wasting water by the gallon watering the limbs right above his head to create rain instead of the shrubs.  (I want to be 4 again!)   However it does kind of have a work 1st - play 2nd ring to it.  Doesn't it?

I think after reading this you don't have to be a psychiatrist to realize I'm already paranoid of how he'll turn out or ruining him to the point of total hedonism or just ruining him period.  Too paranoid.  Actually, so paranoid it's possible I'll end up ruining him worse than if I had just laid back and not worried so much. Oh dear, what to do with Teri.  A paranoid, not strict enough philosophical mom?  Pray. Pray pray pray pray - pray.  PRAY. 

Thank you for the Father, Son, and the Holy Ghost because if I didn't have all three I'd probably spontaneously combust.  Dax is a good, SWEET boy and he's incredibly smart (as most of our kids are - gotta be the prenatal vitamins these days).  And at least I'm not claiming he's demon possessed like some parents I know swear they're child is - yet.  So I should be happy.  For now at least. But all this brilliance also means he can and will fool you with his capabilities to get what he wants.  I remember before he was even born I said.  "There's no way Dax will get away with anything.  Because between me and Clint we did it all.  We are so going to be ahead of his game." ha ....HA! 

At 2 years old he had a milkshake.  A big one.  I told him that he couldn't have anymore until he finished his chicken.  A 2 yr old will not immediately stop asking for something / actually they'll probably cry when you take something they want away.  So I put it behind me on the step - on which I was sitting. I figured out of sight - out of mind.  He finally gave up and wanted to give me a hug (I ate this up and thought him so incredibly sweet).  While hugging me I finally noticed he was reaching for the milkshake. Sneaky little booger.  I had no idea what I'd be facing.

Here's another more of my point of how easily I get taken. (I realize this post keeps getting longer and seemingly pointless but bare with me:

The computer is a constant struggle so much so that today I seriously had to put my foot down.  Because if Dax sees me on the computer it immediately becomes a hassle of trying to tell him why he can only play games for a certain amount of time.  He wants it to play games on Disneyjr.com or Nickjr.com. 

It's really not much of a problem until I pick it up.  Yes I realize there are game consoles and etc. to keep him occupied but I'm not ready to go there and it wouldn't matter if I did.  It's not what Mama's doing, therefore he'd have no interest.  I finally told him if this continuous banter of begging and interruptions continued, which has gone on through this entire computer out pour, that he'd face serious corner time if he couldn't give me even 5 minutes of peace on the computer. 

So after about 2 minutes my SWEET SWEET child comes and sits by me and says "Mom, I'm sorry I argued with you, I'm not going to do that anymore and I won't interrupt constantly." words exact.  Turns me into mush immediately.  While I'm thinking "Oh you are just the sweetest soul, I could just die," he finishes his sentence.  "So you can let me play my game in a minute maybe?"  I so just got taken again.  FOUR!! 4 yrs old and a 1/2 if that makes much of a difference.  I'm not going to call my child a deviant even though it looks as if he's an angel face con, I know he means the love because he says it all the time even when there is nothing to gain, he just knows how to use it to his advantage if he wants something.  He's not learning this from me. I dare not say Clint. I'm totally blaming it on television.  Hey, it's everybody elses' scapegoat... j/k

It's obvious he must be kept occupied or he'll probably end up being a child deviant but I know that doesn't mean that I'm the one to keep him occupied every second of the day.  Which is actually the usual I've recently noticed.   I have got to teach him to occupy himself sometimes so I can take care of other responsibilities.  I'm failing at this miserably.  Probably because it bewilders me, I was so the opposite at his age.  Highly sociable like he is BUT welcomed alone time. Or at least that's how I remember it. 

Between learning his verses, practicing his spelling, learning early math he still has so much energy.  And this mom struggles with time.  So enter God, depart Teri's chaotic brain.  We wait to follow his direction.  We pray that it's filled with equal time w/ Dad and Mom instead of just one of us working and the other one raising.  We hope to one day consolidate business/work so that we can focus on Dax more and not less.   You know the thought of doing that sounds boring or more realistically maybe overbearing.  I say no.  he is the most important thing I will ever do in my life.  Everybody has their own God given purpose and he's ours.

(I say that hopefully without sounding like Norman Bates mother from the series when she's sitting in the boat with Norman, her son, before they throw Summers over the side)  I was flipping channels and landed on that part and it seriously gave me pause.

For now, I know I've got to learn to say no (sometimes of course) and let him learn to entertain himself no matter how much he pouts or what he says.  This child definitely knows what to say to pull your heart strings to giving in.  So teaching him to occupy himself is much easier said then done.  Until he starts all-day school that is.  Then he'll probably be too exhausted - maybe not.  That thought comes after watching the documentary (MUST SEE if you have school age children in public school - maybe even private school as well) The War on Kids.  I'll tell you about that another day.

Okay, enough with getting off the topic.  I never knew how hard discipline would be or deciding when or how to say no or yes.  Does anybody know where I'm coming from?  Am I a nutcase or a total nutcase?  I can say there's definitely an upside.  I never forget to pray.

At End Apology:  Sorry if my points that I try so hard to reach come across as random and hard to follow.  It's quiet the annoying symptom of what's called a scattered brain.   It's kind of like your brain not being able to keep up with your ... brain. Like a 10 tract mind if you will. Some people are highly insulted but you know sometimes the truth hurts and I am in fact at times a scattered brain.  But I own it  -  or at least try to.